✨ the SPARK 182 ~ Business boundaries and getting paid

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Welcome to the 182nd issue of SPARK, a weekly newsletter that helps you transform daily experiences into compelling content that
captivates and sells.

Have you ever had someone you respect and admire say something so directly to you that it stops you in your tracks?

Not something hurtful - but something honest that makes you take a good, hard look at yourself?

I remember the first time my therapist did this with me like it was yesterday (it was 19 years ago).

“You did this to yourself.”

Ouch.

But also… WOW. 🤯

No shame, no judgment, just the truth.

And because of that, I realized what happened wasn’t the end of the world (although it felt like it at the time).

It was also when I started to understand that taking complete and total responsibility for everything in my life was the path to ultimate freedom (it’s been a process… this wasn’t overnight).

And, of course, the thing I “did to myself” ended up being a huge blessing (that story is for another day).

I had an experience this week that left me feeling super irritated with myself because, again, I did it to myself.

This is when I realized I need to be much clearer in my business when it comes to boundaries.

I’m pretty good about sticking to a few rules I’ve set up in my business (no calls on certain days, etc.), but for some reason, I went against that and scheduled a call on a no-call day.

Mistake #1.

Mistake #2 came when the person didn’t show up for the call at the scheduled time, so I rescheduled for later that day. Then, mistake #3 was what I ‘gave away’ on that call.

It was essentially a coaching call… that I did for free.

I got off the call super frustrated with myself.

✔ I scheduled a call on a day that I never schedule calls
✔ After the no-show, I rescheduled for later the same day
✔ I gave away an hour+ of my time that I should have charged for

WTF self?!?!

Nothing in me thinks any of this was anyone’s responsibility but my own. I care about the person I had the call with and willingly did all these things.

This is my sh*t.

That’s when I had my ‘come-to-Jesus’ moment about the boundaries I set in my business.

Because if I don’t respect myself and my expertise enough to honor the commitments I’ve made to myself, why would anyone else?

How to create and honor your business boundaries:

• Define your non-negotiables. One example for me is sticking with no calls on Monday or Friday. If I make an exception, it’s to connect with a friend only.

• Make a list of ‘red flags’ and listen to your gut: We all have those experiences where we know, in our gut, that saying ‘yes’ won’t be worth it. Pay attention to that instinct! Every time I’ve gone against that, I regretted it.

• Create a ‘grace period’: Promise yourself that you won’t say yes or agree to anything without a 24-hour grace period. Give yourself the time to process and think about it. If the person can’t wait, it’s a no.

• Find an accountability partner: I used to think setting up accountability partners or systems was a sign of weakness, but now I realize it’s a superpower. I know what works for me. End of story.

• Get PAID: It’s not as simple as charging what you’re worth. This is about learning to have conversations about your rates without explaining yourself (at the risk of generalizing, women tend to have a harder time with this than men).

These are just a few things you can do to get started. You’ll probably come up with more once you start this process.

Do whatever it takes to support yourself in your business.

The only way to grow and scale is to have boundaries and honor them.

It’s way too easy to get caught up doing busy work instead of your best work (hat tip to Jenny Blake of ‘Rolling in the Doh’ for that one).

This isn’t to say there won’t be exceptions or that life won’t sometimes get in the way. That’s OK.

But make the exceptions and be gentle with yourself from a conscious place.

Taking responsibility and doing so willingly creates an entirely different dynamic.

And lastly… you don’t owe anyone an explanation for how or why you do things.

This is YOUR business.

<end rant 😉>

SPARK Spotlight 🔥

I LOVE this tool!

The future of presentations, powered by AI

Gamma is a modern alternative to slides, powered by AI. Create beautiful and engaging presentations in minutes. Try it free today.

A Little Brainpower 🧠

I love EVERYTHING about this. “Why I’m Returning to Old School Blogging.”

Sam Altman’s full talk on “The Possibilities of AI” at Standford University.

A “meaty” freebie from Justin Welsh. “20 Lessons on my way to $7.5M in Total Business Revenue.”

Tool Time 🛠

• AI Images: This never gets old. It's another free tool for creating whatever you can think of with a simple prompt. Try Ideogram free here.

• Courses & Coaching: A hat tip to Jamie Northrup for this one! Host your courses, membership, coaching, and digital products in one place! Try Pensight free here.

• Speech-to-Text: I haven’t tried many of these, but this looks interesting. Speak as fast as you want and have your message cleaned up. Try Steno free here.

• AI Writing & SEO: Another option for optimized articles (up to 3000 words!). Get your first article free. Try ContentPie here.

Featured Tool:

If you haven’t tried it yet, AI Carousels keeps getting better! You can also create single posts for LinkedIn, upload custom fonts, and so much more.

Content Snackz 🥨

Type of Content: The journey - video shorts

Difficulty: Easy

What it is: Think of this as almost like your own continuing story or weekly episodic show.

For example, I’ve started this with my upcoming move back to Costa Rica. I’ve written a couple of posts on Medium (here’s the latest)- and realized I can do video shorts of this as well. I’ve started picking up things to bring down with me and thought it would be fun to do some ‘behind the scenes’ of what I’m getting, why, and what my plans are.

My move to Costa Rica supports my desire for ease & simplicity in my business and life. Remember, your content doesn’t have to be ‘niche specific’ - and there’s usually a way to connect the pieces.

You go, girl! 🤣

As I was writing the newsletter this week and sharing the story of my therapist being so direct with me (nothing has changed; I can’t get away with much with her… and I love it), I was hit with a massive sense of appreciation and abundance.

For her, the work I’ve done with her and all the things in my life that I appreciate on a whole new level (one of the best gifts of aging).

The sun is out; I caught up with a friend on Zoom who is an amazing human being and powerful woman, and I get to do something I LOVE that supports the life I want to live.

It’s moments and days like this that make navigating our world manageable.

And on those days when you can’t find the moments, do whatever you can to create them or trust that they’ll come again and be easy about it.

You’ve got this.

Have a wonderful day,
Kim

p.s. I’m hosting a FREE Workshop next Wednesday at 11:00 am PDT if you missed my previous email:

Discover & Define "Your ONE Thing"
✨ A power-packed, interactive workshop designed to help you discover a distinctive niche in the noisy content world. Discover what makes your brand uniquely irresistible!